The Newest Little Cath.olic

Last weekend we baptized our sweet boy. It was a particularly lovely weekend with lots of quality family time. B was the best baby of the bunch. He slept through most of it, and made nary a peep when the water was poured on his head. As the priest put it, "The spirit passed through quietly." It was so very special and I was so very proud.

That's our B in his fancy little Nord.strom baby baptismal getup (gift from BIL). He was extraordinarily handsome that day. I still have a severe case of mommy brain. On this day, I forgot to pack some wipes in the diaper bag. I didn't realize this until B had a particularly smelly poo in the middle of the ceremony. I had to improvise during the diaper change and it wasn't pretty, but I managed not to get any poo on the white silk outfit. I've got mad skillz, ya'll.

Some days, I truly struggle with this mommy brain deal. There are some days I feel like such a simpleton, I don't know how I manage to do my job. With this, I must end this post so I can get some sleep. I neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed it.

Time To Make the Doughnuts

I went back to work last week. I miss my son immensely during the day, and picking him up is the highlight of my day.

I have a really great childcare sitch. My friend's mom watches my precious boy. We had a practice week before I went back to work during which I'd drop him off for half days or so and run a bunch of errands while he was there. He did really well. She probably takes better care of him than I do. When J changed B's diaper, she held him under the sink and washed off his little bottom with a sprayer and let him air dry because she thought his bottom was a little red. At the time, he was having bouts of diarrhea so I warned her that was at her own risk. I got a little Valentine's Day gift from her also: glass Bor.n-Fre.e bottles. I guess she doesn't like my BPA-free plastic Avents? She also shoved an orange wedge in my mouth while I was holding B, and also wanted to know if I take Fish Oil so that B will be supersmart. She does this with her daughter, so I guess it is not surprising. I think it is pretty funny actually. B gets a daily trip to the park, weather permitting, and plays all day with my friend's baby and her next door neighbor's son, who is also 3 months older than B.

B got a little off of his schedule at one point, but we are back on track now. I was suspicious that she was changing his schedule to suit her needs, but I don't think that is the case. He is still eating 6 times a day, 3 hours or so apart. We are hoping to drop the late evening feeding as soon as he will tolerate it. We tried dropping it once, but he woke up starving at 0200. I suppose we'll try again in another couple of weeks. Trying to get him to eat a little more during the day and less at night. We shall see.

My day goes as follows:

0400: pump while getting dressed for work.
0530: work
0730 or thereabouts: breakfast break and pump. B is allegedly awake at this point, and A is feeding him and takes him to the nanny's. Usually B eats again around 1000.
0800: try to figure what the hell is going on at work.
1100: lunch break and pump again. Call for B update.
1530: Try to pump again, otherwise, it is pumping in the car on the way home all the while praying that 1)no one peeks in the car, 2) I don't get in a wreck and 3) I don't get pulled over.
1600: leave work to go pick up B.
1800-2100: Feed B, give him bath, prepare bottles for the next day, attempt to shower
2200: pump so A can feed B. Clean bottles and pump parts for next day.
2230 pray B sleeps until 0700. He usually does, but when A doesn't point the wizzer down, his pajamas get all wet and he wakes up cranky. Grrrrr.....

The good thing is that since I work 10 hours a day, I get each Wednesday off. Tomorrow I am planning to hang out with B all day and go to a doc's appt.


I feel like I am walking around in some really dense fog at work. A lot changed while I was out. We now utilize a completely different computer application and all of my passwords for our myriad of computer applications were all expired. Also, before I had access to the Working Mother's Room at work, I had to find an empty hospital room to pump in and pray that one of the nursing assistants didn't walk in on me. As I get back into the swing of things, there is so much that I am forgetting, and policies and procedures are changing daily! I feel like Ron Livin.gston in Offi.ce S.pace when 7 different people tell him to put cover sheets on his TPS reports. Oy!

Got a couple of other posts in the works, namely about my follow up RE appt and other doc appt. Off to feed my boy.

New Pic

Ben at 8 weeks

Going back to work next Monday. Am horrible mess. He is so much more fun now!

#2

Last week, A's office had a shower for us and 3 other couples who had babies. I am certain that A did not share with any of his coworkers our IF struggles and our eventual method of conception. So you can probably imagine how hard I had to work to hide my annoyance when we got hit with the slew of "When are you going to have another?" Actually, we have been asked this question throughout my pregnancy. We usually give the evasive, "We'll play it by ear." It's really not an easy question for us to answer.


Our fresh IVF cycle blessed us with a beautiful son and one totsicle in deep freeze. When our RE called to give us our report on our remaining embryos after our transfer, he said that only one embryo made it to freeze. He said it didn't look like it would make it, but it continued to grow and turned out to be a grade 4 (the grade that got me pregnant). I am a little disconcerted by the "didn't look like it would make it" part. OK, it semi-haunts me. What is that supposed to mean?


The rate of success for thaw is 2 out of 3. The odds of that embryo getting me pregnant is about 25%. This embryo is technically a fraternal twin to Ben, although with a different birthdate, obviously. But I am not exactly counting on Ben having a sibling because those odds reek of crapshoot.



A few months ago at work, I had a conversation with a patient's family member that made me think about this issue. I am not sure why people feel they can be so nosy with nurses, or why they feel the need to reveal so much about themselves. But on this particular day I was game. She began by asking about my pregnancy and I let her know it is our first baby. She said that she has a daughter herself, who is now college age, and never had more children because she had a bicornuate uterus and it was hard for her to get pregnant. She said that she herself is an only child, which never bothered her until she began taking care of her parents. It's just her that bears that difficult burden. Not only does she help with care for her own father, she does the same for her husband's family. I hate the thought of B bearing that responsibility solo.

One of the babies at the shower was approaching her first birthday. The office never had a shower for the couple because the baby was born two months early, and both mother and baby had some health issues to overcome. I kept looking at her and thinking what a miracle she must be. I also thought how terrified the parents must have been. I have had a healthy baby and healthy pregnancy and it was all so perfect. Not for one single second do I take that for granted. I fear not having a similar experience with a second go-round.

There is also the fact that we would have to pay again to conceive. Our insurance does not cover fertility treatments, so we will again face hefty out of pocket costs. The FET for our remaining embryo will cost about 1/3 of our IVF cycle. Even then it isn't exactly chump change. I am not certain that I'd be willing to go through another IVF cycle if the FET doesn't result in a pregnancy. We do alright financially, but we have to give thought to where we spend our money. Do we give Ben the gift of a sibling, or set that money aside for his college ambitions so he's not paying back loans for years like we had to do? I am willing to bet all those folks that ask about #2 never had to consider these things themselves.

One thing is certain. Whether or not there is a sibling in the future, I know that we will always have Ben. I will never be disappointed with that.

Results are in...

So I got my test results in the mail from my doctor's appointment a couple of weeks back that was mainly about my throat but turned into a general checkup. My cholesterol, average blood sugar and ALT (one test of liver function) are all elevated. Per his note, "all of these are related to our converstation about insulin resistnce and limiting carbohydrates. The solution is the diet we discussed." The diet limits carbs to 130 grams a day (doable, but hard initially), unlimited meat, dairy, nuts, fish, eggs, and limits the veggies to those with lower carb content. So, if I am going to have a carb, it damn well better be worth it. I know we will discuss this in more detail at my appt next week, but it is a jumping off point. No longer can I eat sugar guilt free.

I 'Heart" your blog

Brenda gave me an I 'Heart' your blog award. I am touched! She will soon be doing her 3rd IVF cycle and I sincerely hope it brings her heart's desire.



The way this works is I answer the following questions with single word responses, and pass the award on to 7 other bloggers:


1. Where is your cell phone? Couch
2. Where is your significant other? Work
3. Your hair color? Blonde
4. Your mother? Practical
5. Your father? Softie
6. Your favorite thing? Food
7. Your dream last night? Non-existent
8. Your dream/goal? Serenity
9. The room you're in? Living room
10. Your hobby? Shopping
11. Your fear? Illness
12. Where do you want to be in six years? Hmmmm.....
13. Where were you last night? Home
14. What you're not? Relaxed
15. One of your wish list items? Lotto
16. Where you grew up? Houston
17. The last thing you did? Pediatrician
18. What are you wearing? Sweats
19. Your T.V.? HGTV
20. Your pet? Obese
21. Your computer? Slow
22. Your mood? Relieved
23. Missing someone? Friends
24. Your car? Family-mobile
25. Something you're not wearing? Earrings
26. Favorite store? Nordstrom
27. Your Summer? Joyful
28. Love someone? AB
29. Your favorite color? Blue
30. When is the last time you laughed? Today
31. Last time you cried? Yesterday


I'd like to pass this along to Mrs. Shoes, Kathy, and Sara. I know it's not 7. Least favorite character trait? Lazysometimes.

Raspy like an 80 year old smoker

I have had laryngitis since B was born. I had no drainage or soreness, so I didn't really do anything about it until recently because I was overwhelmed with newborn life. At my two week checkup, my OB said the rest my voice and drink peppermint tea with lemon and honey and hopefully it would go away in about 2 weeks. When that didn't happen, I got a referral to an internist. He thinks that I could have had silent reflux toward the end of my pregnancy as the cause of my laryngitis. He has put me on Prevaci.d for 3 weeks (in addition to Nasacort) and will reevaluate. He thought it might also be allergies, but it is really hard to tell. It seems my OB refers all his patients with issues to this guy, so it seems to be something he has seen a little of. He has said that he has referred patients to an ENT before, and they have scoped, told them they have reflux and put them on a proton pump inhibitor. So, hopefully skipping a $300 charge here. If it doesn't resolve, then he'll refer me to an ENT.

The internist also has an interest in insulin resistance, diabetes and weight control as it leads to heart disease. He also cross-trained in Med/Peds. It is possible I may be insulin resistant. He asked abut my glucose during pregnancy, and I let him know that I flunked the first glucose and passed the four hour. He said that I have some cherry hemagiomas (small pinkish-red ill-defined spots) on my chest that are a sign of insulin resistance. Of course, he has ordered labs drawn and all of that to see if that really is the case. He would like me to follow a moderate carb diet, 130 grams a day. He said that breastfeeding moms can follow the diet, but I am curious as to what my OB says. Truth is, I'd love to lose weight. I have 15 lbs to go from my pre-pregnancy weight. And that isn't counting the 20 lbs of marriage weight I have gained in the past 5 years. Scary, isn't it?

With these prescriptions comes paranoia. Everything I have googled on the internet says not to take Preva.cid while breastfeeding. My OB wasn't available, but I called my ped's office, and they have said that both meds prescribed are fine for breastfeeding. In fact, they prescribe Prev.acid for infants with reflux sometimes. Still, I can't help but worry.

Hope you all had a wonderful Christmas (if that is what you celebrate) and begin a wonderful New Year!

Life with a Newborn-One Month Old

bb and mtb gave me a good idea for a post: Life with a newborn.

I'm not gonna lie: the first two weeks sorta sucked. We were getting used to each other, attempting to figure out how this kid was going to get my milk, and then throw a holiday into the mix and it was meltdown city daily. Don't get me wrong; I love my son and I am in total awe of him. In some ways, it is almost hard to believe he is actually here and not a figment of my imagination. I felt really guilty that I wanted this baby for literally years and here I was complaining about how hard it was, of all things! And I am someone who had prepared for life after birth by reading lots of baby care books. It took a bit of time before I let go of the guilt and let myself acknowledge that it is OK to be frustrated while getting to know my son, it is OK to not know what to do and it is OK to cry and help those postpartum hormones work their way out of my system. It seems most new parents have experienced this frustration. But I felt that since it took us so long to achieve parenthood, I wasn't entitled to these NORMAL feelings. Things got so much better after I realized this.

After T-giving weekend, we had a week where A went back to work and I worked on handling this child. My mom was over 4 out of 5 workdays that week and it was great. It was great to have someone help us out with household chores, make us dinner, etc. Then A went out of town for work after my birthday so my mom stayed with me until he came home.

I managed to hurt her feelings, despite all the help she gave. Which of course, gives me a heaping dose of Catholic guilt. I have been working to get B on a schedule (sort of Ba.by W.ise-ing him--I like the plan but could do without some of his personal commentary in the book) and trying to sleep train him since I am planning to return to work. I got bent out of shape when he sort of fussed, didn't cry and she went to pick him up instead of let him fall back to sleep like he usually does. We were going to the pediatrician and I was hoping to feed him a little closer to the appt in order to have a peaceful appt and ride to and fro. I apologized and all, and we got over it. Sigh...... I know I've got control issues.

B eats about every 2.5-3 hours starting around 7 am give or take. Then there is a sort of activity time where he is alert and we "play" as much as one can with a month old child and then it's time for a nap. This repeats itself all day long. For a while, I was setting an alarm to get up at night to feed him, but I don't anymore. I let him wake me up, which he does about every 3.5-4 hours at night. It has taken some time, but I think we are starting to figure each other out. I am getting better at telling if he is tired vs. hungry, hungry vs. gassy, etc. There have been a few rough nights where he fussed for a pretty long time and I got extremely frustrated, but those a few and far between. We had our one month check up and he is up to 10 lbs 14 oz and grew another half inch in length. Woohoo! I suppose we are doing something right.

I have loved watching his development! He is definitely more interactive now, tracking objects and sounds, etc. He loves to just wiggle around on his back, and tolerates tummy time alright. I think he smiled intentionally at me today, which I have read they don't do until around 6 weeks. Clearly he is a genius! I love looking at his sweet little face while he sleeps. His expression goes from a giant smile to extreme frown with furrowed brow to eyes rolling to the back of his head (which freaks me out, btw). I also love his little noises he makes: grunting when he is first trying to feed, cooing while he is lying on his back staring at the ceiling fan, contented sigh while he is falling asleep.



Daytime television is disappointing at best. I am pissed beyond belief that Jeopa.rdy! has been moved from its delightful afternoon time to nearly midnight. I usually watch H.GTV or F.ood Network for background noise unless there is something more worthwhile on. A insists on playing E.SPN and Go.lf channel when he is around. We don't let B watch tv, but A thinks he will be a pro-golfer since he is learning the game by osmosis. By the way, I have had laryngitis since about 2-3 days after he was born. I don't have any soreness or any drainage, so it doesn't seem to be an infection. I was told to rest my voice and drink peppermint tea with lemon and honey and it should go away in 2 weeks. We'll see. I'm pretty tired of this, because I am dying to talk to my friends instead of IM or text. Am getting a bit of cabin fever too. But it has been cold down here (for Texas, people) and it is RSV season to boot, and I am superparanoid.



Our house is a mess now that my mom isn't here to clean for us. It definitely looks like we have a small child! We've got a pack n play, swing and bouncer crowding our living room. There are piles and piles of mail everywhere and it is nothing short of a miracle that I found time to pay bills. There are also piles and piles of laundry everywhere. I have no idea how I will ever cook a real meal ever again. Time seems to fly right out the window, and most of my very small goals (such as eliminating one small pile of paper/junk mail, writing overdue thank you notes) do not get met.



My husband was awesome for the first two weeks. He is now back at work and had quite a bit of catching up to do. He is able to work from home a lot, but I try to manage mostly without him because come the new year, I really will be on my own during the day until I return to work. That somewhat backfired on me, because he started whining about changing diapers, saying that he needed "help." I told him he needed "practice." He does what I ask him to do, but it requires pointing out, i.e. nagging. I have insisted that he handle him in the evening so that I can shower and have a little time to myself. That short amount of time to myself has done wonders for my sanity.



So, if you are expecting your own little miracle expect:

• to have a decided lack of sleep (duh)


• profound joy


• a messy house


• setbacks to your best laid plans


• to bicker with your husband


• to cry at the drop of a hat for the first two weeks, maybe more


• to be irritated at just about everyone, no matter how helpful they might be
• to experience very labile emotions (or is it just me?)
• to be challenged by breastfeeding
• plenty of unwanted assvice

Insist on:

• a daily shower


• family (or whomever you have helping you) helping with more than just the baby.


• some small amount of time to yourself.

If I don't get to drop back in here, I hope all of you have a great holiday season!

Pictures!

Can I just say how much I love his little face? It makes it easy to be a proud mom.

On a side note, my MIL wants to have Christmas dinner at her house this year. I feel like Joh.nny Dr.ama on Ent.ourage: "VICTORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

I'll Be Damned

It is actually snowing in Houston. It is such a freak occurrence down here that A told me to video it.

Growing, update and b!tch session

Well, it seems I/we am/are doing something right. Our son has grown 2.5 inches and is up 3 oz. from his birth weight at his two week checkup. Hooray for the nipple shield! Ben's jaundice is now completely resolved (thanks for asking, B!). We are so fortunate.

I had heard about this on the today show, but wanted to post this article link.

I also wanted to add that I am so tickled that Ben and Eli share the same birthday. I can't wait for our little IVF miracles to have their first lunch date.

I am also excited today because Baby Steps to Baby Shoes' child will be born today. I am so thrilled for them. I am literally sitting around waiting to get the joyous email announcing this birth.


Things are going far better this week. B is eating like a champ, I am no longer crying at the drop of a hat, and Thanksgiving weekend is over and the onslaught of visitors has slowed to a trickle and a few phone calls.

I am pretty big on personal space. I about lost my shit this past weekend when:

• my MIL came by to pick up my BIL (who was visiting from out of town and staying at her place) and asked if her girlfriend could come in and see our baby at 10:30 PM.
• My MIL returned to San Antonio Sunday and my BIL assumed he'd be staying with us since his flight back home was not until 12/2. I had an outright hissy fit because with a 12 day old infant and postpartum hormones, I was not ready for a houseguest. Nor was I ready to run upstairs and hide each time B needed to eat. I am still anemic from the blood loss, not to mention still enduring some back pain and get worn out when I overdo it. My husband finally saw the light. Thank goodness.
• MIL and BIL wanted A (and myself as well) to go to brunch with them Saturday, which was fine. My mom was available to stay with me since I was really not ready to be solo with Ben, nor was I ready to go out to lunch. Then A comes back from brunch asking if my mom could stay around so that they could go to dinner as well. My mom is a bit of a fuddy-duddy and doesn't like to drive late at night. So he asked if it would be OK if SIL came over so I wasn't alone. I was not comfortable bossing around an 8 month pregnant SIL. Nor was I comfortable showing her my tits, as the major thing I needed help with at the time was breastfe.eding. I was rather pissed that his family was putting him in the position of feeling torn between visiting with them and staying with us to take care of our needs. Ultimately, he wound up staying at home that night after another hissy fit on my part. Did I mention yet that A is attending a conference next week and will be staying with BIL for 5 days? Plenty of brotherly bonding time then, IMHO.

Not sure if I was overreacting to some of that, but I am fairly certain I wasn't. I think the postpartum hormones (such a powerful thing, really) have equilibrated somewhat. It also helps that my mom has come around on a near daily basis to make us dinner, wash our clothes, etc. It is wonderful because she helps me how I want to be helped, not how she thinks I need to be helped. I am glad my personal space is now my own again.

My recovery was just fine, though I am anemic from the blood loss. I can still feel it a bit when I have to run up and down the stairs too much. My incision doesn't bother me so much, but my back does. Perhaps I am guarding. My neighbor lent me her abdominal binder and it really helps.

Baby Ben had newborn jaundice. It was superfun because my milk had not come in and he was eating like a champ. One night he nursed for over 100 minutes during one session. He was not peeing or pooping an adequate amount, and he was a very drowsy feeder. It was a monumental effort to get this kid to wake up and eat. After many tears, heaving sobs (I know. Seriously) and a lot of guilt, I caved and gave him formula. Turns out, it is NOT the end of the world!

I did really want him to have mostly breastmilk, so our ped recommended that I pump every two hours during the day and every three at night until the jaundice resolved and he began to have good output. After 48 hours of this I was pretty exhausted and eager to return to the boob. Except the kid refused to nurse. At my last lactation consult, I was given a nipple shield to use. So he is now at the boob, but won't take my nip. While using the shield, I was told that it can diminish my supply (it is harder for him to nurse with this than it is my actual breast) so I should continue to pump while using it. I also need to keep a strict I&O on him for this reason. It is supposed to be a short-term solution, only to be used for a week or so. We shall see. I have read on a message board that some have used it for weeks, even months, and some even the whole time they breastfeed. I hope he transitions soon.

Ben has gotten a bit fussy at times and refuses to sleep, and for some reason, it is only when A picks him up that it stops. Totally makes me feel inadequate.

Anyhoo, hopefully there will be a more coherent post from me in the future, possibly with a new pic of Ben.

How It All Shook Out

On Sunday night, I noticed that I was possibly beginning to lose my mucus plug. Pretty gross stuff. Then I noticed a dampness to the undies, and wasn't able to conclude if this was just me weeing on myself or of my water had broken. I called my OB and his partner returned my call and told me to go in to determine what the case was. I didn't really think anything was happening since I wasn't having contractions. I was convinced we'd be told to just go home. Lo and behold, after a couple of exams (one of which was with a speculum--ugh), turns out it was my water that broke. I was relieved to know I wasn't just peeing on myself.

I was started on Pito.cin around 0130, and I finally had some contractions. I lasted until around 0700 and then I really wanted an epidural. The oncoming nurse, bless her kind soul, talked me into some Stad.ol to relax since I hadn't slept at all. She was worried that I would be too tired to push when it came time for that. It really helped with the epidural placement also, because I had quite a bit of anxiety about that (stupid nurse-y fears of complications and all). After that it was rather smooth sailing, in terms of pain. I was able to watch my contractions and the baby's HB on the monitor. There were a couple of decels that were noted at certain points of the day. I could see a concerned look on my OB's face despite the pleasantly stoned feeling that I was experiencing.

About 1900, the decision was made to deliver via C-section for several reasons. My membranes had been ruptured for 24 hours, I was + for Group B strep and I had not progressed past 7 cm. I was very cool with it, as I was pretty ready to meet my Ben. Since it turns out that he was an enormous baby (the biggest baby on the postpartum floor, turns out), I am glad I was sectioned because I am pretty sure my vagina and bladder would never be the same.

In what felt like mere seconds, they showed me my son. He was/is gorgeous! Big healthy cry, and looks just like dada. He had tons of scratches on his face though, from his supersharp little nails. I'll have to post a more recent pic of him, since he is much cuter now with his clear skin.


To be continued....

Introducing...

Benjamin Edward was born on 11/17/08!

Vital Stats:

9 lbs, 7 oz.

21 1/2 inches long

delivered via C-section

I'll have to give you all the rundown later, but he is a dream come true.

In short:

• Epidurals are from Heaven.
• Breastfeeding is effin' hard, even if you are hypermammiferous.
• I've had all the assvice I can take.
• I am really ready for my own personal space to be mine again.

Still here (40w3d)

Am still incubating. Am still not having a lot in the way of contractions, but just some lower abdominal stuff. I do think I lost a little of my mucus plug though. Hopefully at this late date that is a sign things will come sooner than later?

Does he know it's his due date?

So much for that full moon theory. Bunch of bollocks. Like I knew it was.

So I have called the doc's office to schedule my induction for next Thursday. Am awaiting instructions.

Yesterday, I could hear my husband on the phone with his mother. On his end, I heard things like, "No it's based on the doctor's advice," "They know more now than they did back then," and "He will only let us go one week past the due date" in the tone that he uses when he is talking to his mother (caring, but slightly exasperated). So, I go downstairs and jokingly ask him if she wants me to go to 45 weeks. He said no, but she was wondering if we could schedule the induction for Friday instead of Thursday.

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Comfy little bugger

Baby boy is apparently very happy right where he is. Nice and active, plenty of amniotic fluid to swim in. Still head down. I am still not effin' dilated, and no more effaced than I was last week (50%). Thursday is my actual due date, and if I am not in labor by then, I am to call the office to schedule an induction date for the following Thursday, 11/20. If nothing else, I know that I will meet our son on that day. I would certainly like it to be before then, though.

My husband actually made his first real misstep the other day.

A: Are you going to stop walking like a penguin after you have the baby?
K: (Silence. Eyes narrow to slits, secretly thinking,"Gawd, I hope so.")

Looks like I've got a lot more penguin walking to do and mercy sex to be had before this kid comes out. Guess I'd better get cracking.

Picture Time

We decided to try and keep the camera, and it seems to be working so far! We talked to some guys from the Geek Squad about some modifications we can make and it seems to work with the pics we have taken thus far. So, I guess I'll do some sharing here.

Dresser/Changing table/Supplies

Crib with Mobile (bumper will come off soon)

Chair for mama to rock and feed (and nap)

Funny, it doesn't look like it was taken with a high definition camera. Huh. it does look fabulous on y computer and on our tv, though. I think I did read something that picture quality is shoddy in low lighting. Whatev. We'll see.

And, just so you can see what condition my feet are in. I used to have pretty feet. Hopefully they will be again in a few short days!

Threw in the Towel (39w1d)

I have officially thrown in the towel and am no longer at work. My back was hurting me badly at night, during the day and more or less all other times. I had to take Tylenol before I went to bed and before I went to work to get through the day, and even that wasn't helping. My doc had offered me Vicodin, but of course, that is not compatible with patient care at work (or maybe it would make it more tolerable!). So I figured it was time.

To celebrate, we went to purchase a camcorder to record Ben's entrance to the world for all of posterity (with a view only from behind my head, of course). We thought we would buy an HD camcorder/camera since we have an HDTV and all. Once we started reading instructions, I realized that this is probably a little too much technology for us. My laptop doesn't have a big enough CPU to handle the HD stuff, and my husband's is frequently traded in at work. Not to mention, if I want to watch the videos we record, we'd have to buy a Blu-ray disc to do so. So we are looking at additional several hundred $$ just to buy stuff compatible with this camera. Oy. We will likely take it back tonight and get a lesser camcorder and a better digital camera, probably one of those SLR types. I think I am more of a picture person anyway. I suppose we should have put a little more thought into it beforehand, but oh well.

To help expedite Ben's entrance into the world, I went to the Galleria today to waddle around. I went to Nordstrom, which I didn't realize had a children's section (or more accurately, never really cared before) and I found such delights as $119 True Religion jeans for toddlers and $240 Juicy ensembles for older girls. Yes, you are reading that correctly. Yikes! It wasn't all quite that bad, but B won't be wearing any True Religion jeans unless a grandparent decides to spring for them (and that likelihood is pretty close to nil).

Off to get a bit more waddling in and get this baby out!

Progress!!! (38w5d)

I am now 50% effaced, although not really dilated. He has dropped a little bit from last week. Doc seems to think that when I start to dilate, things will go quickly. He may even be here within a week! He is estimating his weight to be 7 lbs 9 oz right now, so within another week he can gain anywhere from 1/4 to a whole pound. So we are looking at an 8 pounder.

Hopefully I am not jumping the gun, but I am seriously considering saying Peace Out, see you in 3 months! starting on Friday. Or maybe Thursday. We shall see.